Calvin Nash admits he found it incredibly hard to sit back and watch Munster's ten-try thriller with Connacht, a match in which Ireland rival Mack Hansen made a statement comeback.
Munster wing Nash was the biggest beneficiary of the unfortunate shoulder injury suffered by Hansen when the teams met on New Year's Day.
The 27-year-old went on to start all seven subsequent Ireland Tests, five in the Six Nations and the summer games against South Africa, as Hansen went through a long rehabilitation.
Upon his return, in Connacht's 35-33 loss to Munster at the weekend, Hansen played like he’d never been away, a constant threat with ball in hand, popping up all over the field and showing how much the province missed him in his absence.
It served as a timely reminder to Ireland head coach Andy Farrell that the 26-year-old, who scored nine tries in 21 internationals, isn’t going anywhere and wants his jersey back when New Zealand come to town on 8 November.
"He's a great player and I didn't expect him to be lying down against Munster of all teams.
"It's unreal to have Mack back, he's an unbelievable player and I can't imagine that the last few months have been easy for him.
"Delighted to have him back. Competition is great to have and hopefully it brings out the best in me."
Graham Rowntree’s side scored five tries, including three from backs Shane Daly, Mike Haley and Alex Nankivell, and Nash - who is being phased back into action after the summer tour - admitted that he would have loved to be involved in an incredible season-opener.
"I was screaming, it's so tough watching games, delighted with could get the five points," he said.
"I wouldn't have minded playing this week but next week [for round 3] is when we are all up for selection."
It’s been a whirlwind nine months for the Limerick man, who only won his first Irish cap against Italy in the pre-World Cup warm-up game in August 2023.
He didn’t make the cut for the tournament in France but Hansen’s injury, and a neck issue for Leinster’s Jimmy O’Brien opened up a gap and he hasn’t looked back since.
"[I was] delighted to make my debut," said Nash, who has two tries to his name in green.
"I didn't know how it was going to go and it was massively disappointing not to make the World Cup squad. It was hard to know where I stood.
"Coming into the Six Nations I kinda thought I might get one game off the bench but ended up starting.
"I just kept starting every week. I was beaming. I didn't think I would be selected so high up."
On making his Six Nations debut against France, he recalled his "extreme" nerves ahead of the 38-17 win, in which he scored Ireland's third try.
"The training week we had, I was trying my best to get all over my detail so I could try to express myself and not be caught up with all the calls, where do I have to be?" he said.
"As much work as I did, I couldn't shake my nerves for the French game, I was up the walls.
"It was so extreme. Faz [Andy Farrell] pulled me over in the captain's run and was like, 'hey lad, what's going on with you, you are totally different'.
"To me I was hiding it perfectly well, but clearly I wasn't. Having a chat with him and Gary [Keegan, performance coach] put me at ease.
"The self-doubt that was creeping in and snowballing seemed to stop. It was a good intervention by them."
Nash has played 72 times for Munster since making his debut in 2017 but speaking at the launch of the new season of Tackle Your Feelings school’s programme, he revealed that his slow progress up the ranks made him question if he wanted to continue as a professional.
He managed just 21 appearances across his first four seasons.
"This campaign coming into schools is a good way for younger kids dealing with mental health," he added.
"That was something that I struggled with, if I was good enough.
"Rarely in workplaces would you have every week some lads telling you that you're terrible at this, or why the hell did you make this mistake. You are getting a bit of a scalding sometimes.
"A few years ago I was struggling with why I wasn't being picked. I'm giving 100% all the time and I felt like I deserved a reward. Then I was wondering if this was taking too much of a toll on me?
"I was going home, fighting with my brother about why I'm not being picked, fighting with my parents and they were getting the brunt of it.
"I'm delighted that I came out on the other side and looking back I can say that it built a lot of resilience for me and my career."
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